And Just Like That...

 Letter originally posted July 18, 2016

This will be rather short, due to a certain lack of time. Today we had our all day P Day. It was full of goodbyes. The email that you got today was from the Brady family, the ones that we skyped with last time.

... What can I say?

This is the last time that I will write you guys. I never imagined that this moment would come.

Oops. That was cliche and obvious. *banging head on keyboard trying to be creative*

I am so excited to see all of my loved ones again. I am excited to do everything that I loved doing before the mission and more. I am excited for everything that follows.

I am devastated from the goodbyes. I have never had my heart wrenched so far and so hard in this way. I never realized just how much I have grown to love the mission and love the people here in México. I love this Gospel.

Thinking about these goodbyes has brought me to the conclusion that nothing hurts more than loving a person. Loving someone so much that you would give anything and everything for them. And opening your heart so widely to someone that living in very imperfect conditions in this very imperfect life, making sometimes not-so-perfect decisions paves the way for pain and grief that is as profound as it is exquisite.

I guess that is why, in part, the Atonement was such a harrowing experience for our Lord and Savior. I can't even imagine all that he went through and felt participating in all of our disappointments, sadnesses, unjustices, sins, sicknesses, depression, and everything in between. I am so grateful that there are people in my life that aren't afraid of being hurt. People that are willing to love me. Love and devotion is the most valuable gift that one can recieve and give.

Sometimes I wish that loving someone was easier.

But then again, it wouldn't be as worth it without that hard aspect.

I'm not crying. It is raining inside.

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I honestly don't know what more to say aside from the overriding emotion that has dominated my mind and soul for these last two years.

I love you.

See you soon. :)

Elder Kennington